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Crush

WHAT IS A CRUSH?

A crush is an intense desire to be with someoneto who you may be attracted because of their looks, personality or just because they smiled at you. Crushes are usually temporary infatuations and fade away as a person grows in maturity.

Crushes are a natural feeling to have, we have been created with an innate desire for the opposite sex so these feelings you are experiencing are perfectly natural. Coupled with the hormones coursing through our bodies, they are impossible to avoid completely. However, what *is* in our control is *how* we react to these feelings. What we have here is a closet of weapons that can keep you armed and in control of your feelings, and which can tone them down a notch or too, God-willing.

TYPES AND CAUSES OF CRUSH

Crushes can happen for a variety of reasons, but most of them can be fitted into one of the categories below:

  • Crush on cousin or a family friend or on a classmate. This is due to the onset of maturity and the innocence of the person, it is usually their first crush.
  • Some people start developing a crush on their teachers or other staff at school (Attracted to older people).
  • Celebrity crushes, this is exacerbated due to their potrayal in the media and their continuos appearance in Music Videos and across social media each time a person checks their devices.
  • College or work crush, this is primarily due to increased proximity and spending 7-8 hours a day with each other. One needs to be very careful of such a crush.
  • Few have crushes even after getting married but that comes under lust & the immoral thoughts of an extramarital affair. Lowering your gaze even after marriage is highly important.

IDEAS & INSIPIRATIONS TO OVERCOME THE PROBLEM

So How Do I Overcome My Crush?

With Allaah’s help and a few simple steps, it will become easier to manage a crush in shaa Allaah!

  • Turning to Allaah

    Asking Allaah for His Help and seeking His Forgiveness for what has passed will help you to manage your feelings. After all, what more do you need than having Allah on our side?

  • Lowering your gaze

    You must have heard this a thousand times before, but it holds true! Gawking at your crush is only going to exacerbate your feelings. Avoid looking at them unnecessarily.

  • Saying NO to rom-coms, movies and love songs

    This will keep your emotions in check.

  • Cutting all routes and avoiding being alone with them

    Intentionally putting yourself in situations where you might bump into him/her, cyberstalking them, and calling their landline just to hear their voice won’t make it any easier! It’s going to be hard, but the fact is this- if they are not meant to be in your life, you’re simply hurting yourself in the long run. If they *are* meant to be in

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STEPS YOU CAN TAKE

Having read all of this, you may be feeling overwhelmed, anxious or helpless, but don’t worry as Allaah is Extremely Merciful and Especially Merciful. The change starts with YOU. Make your intention to abstain from acting upon your crush and make plenty of dua to Allaah. Nothing is impossible for Him. If you’re feeling guilty, turn back to Him. Repent. It’s never too late. Think of all those who might get affected; you, your parents, your whole family, the other person and his/her whole family. All for a petty temporary infatuation! Is it worth ruining your dunya and Hereafter over?

Is the reward for good (anything) but good? "

- The Noble Qura'an

Wouldn’t you like to be one of those who have achieved good in return of leaving an evil and doing good? To be one of those who Allaah is pleased with? If Allaah is pleased with you, you’ll have the whole world in your hands. All you need to do is take that one step to stay away and not listen to the Shaytaan. And YOU can do it.

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